Flipped (08/27/08)

Welcome Back...

Society's Been Tryin Me
Love's Been Lyin 2 Me
Evil Hidez in Me
And Still I try 2 be
The best person that could ever reside in me.
And they say...I flipped

BUT...

Is it I who took a life 360
or is it those who sought to frighten me
those who want to see me
Back where I shouldn't be
Those who could neva see
What true "depths" lie in what they see
Because they see me, and yet they can't see "ME"

The "ME" that sleeps, wen I'm up
The "ME" that awakens wen I want to give up
The "ME" that is fearless
The "ME" that I call my "HEarTLeSS"
The "ME" that always & forever shall be a "WE"

Ma Bro told me "Be Ready"
CuZ Shyt Gon Flip
Gravity Gon PulL
Cuz We All have our gifts
But with a gift, comes our curse
Cuz we have a Curse
The Curse is the "ME" on the inside
The Curse that we've all been given to demonstrate
To the World that our life was not a fluke

Heartless/Nobody (Part 2) (02/28/08)

So i suppose you was waitin 4 me 2 explain

Da second part of the name

Tha name dat branded ma soul

That began tha tale

That tale that is now beginning anotha chapter

A chapter in tha story of a legend

Nobody

Lame, wack, social leper, those were namez for it

It always seemed dat i was an outcast

Seemed to be no avoidin' it

Wateva was happenin in tha world,

i was usually four steps behind

Night life............wat was dat

I stayed in da house and dat was dat

Final Fantasy nd mayb a lil madden

Mondayz were tha worst

Always had 2 listen 2 othas bout wat had happened

Man just 4 once

I wanted 2 b apart of it

But I stayed away

for fear of rejection

I became a member of my own section

outcast of society

but never did i lose

tha tru part of me

never felt tha need 2 fake a front

to put on a big stunt

fittin' in was neva dat important

i rocked ma cheap azz shoes

each and every day

excelled in sports

nd brought bak All A'z

that face in tha clouds

still refuses to fully surface today

but im lettin ma good side show

the dark part of mah life

helped me show my light

to those that kno me

dey kno im right

where'z there'z light

there'z also tha dark

i've learned to live with both

nd never will we part

my light keepz helpz me smile

my dark keepz me alive

put them 2getha...u have a man wit pride

AJ is ma Heartless

Henry is ma Nobody

Put em 2getha

nd u got 1 hell of a sumbody

so people

embrace your darkness

cherish your light

use them both

to do wat chu feel is rite

....Laugh At Me

....Take a second and chuckle with me
....Take another second and laugh at me
Laugh because I'm a mere shell of my own personal glory
Chitin based outer being that was much deeper.

Feel my ups
Relinquish my downs
Take a gander at all my turn arounds

Life is but a weird conundrum
And I am no different
But honestly I wish to be seen as normal
Than to stand out in it.

I notice my inequities
My abilities & levels of higher thinking
Clairvoyance aside
Sometimes I just dont want to hear my mind ticking
 
In a world where people do their damnest
to find their own path
And still manage to blend in
I'd rather mask the things that make me great
Just to travel amongst the mundane
& not see every angle
every possibility
every outcome
every fate


I'd rather see life as it hits me
square in the face....
So laugh at me...
nothing more left to do...
But laugh...because in all my uniqueness.....
I'd rather appear to be like you.....

Drifting

Let my soul float
Away from my being
Forget all logic
Forget all reasoning

Let me drift
Let me sway
Allow me to forget there was a today
Allow me to forget there was a yesterday

I dont care that there will be a tomorrow
Or the possibility that there may not be a tomorrow
My pain is non-existent 
& So is my sorrow
When the music takes me away
None of you can touch me.
I am awake, alive, & invincible
Nothing but dark, starlit skies above me.

Let my soul, drift away from my body
And the beat take me away
Mellow out & disappear from this troubled place
As soon as I hit play.....

Behind.......

It never fails. Another group sets out on their greatest accomplishment to date, and thanks to my late development as a college student, I'm still waiting on my turn. Depressing.

So lets be honest

Let's be honest
Yes. I'm weak
No need to lie about it
I'll fold in the right situation
& im human enough to know it

Let's be honest
The gift I had for poetry
To place my thoughts & dreams on the screen
Transferred through these fingertips
All seem lost....Like it never existed
Somethin like a dream

Let's be honest
my spine hurts
it hurts like shyt
the skin of my back turns red
Because my spine is pressed up against it
Hurts to the point where sometimes I play video games
& tears roll....cuz I hurt like shyt
But I refrain from over complaining...
Cuz theres nothing i'd prefer to do to it

Let's be honest
I hate bougie folk
Not dislike, have a distaste for
I hate bougie folk
your constant disdain
for the things I refuse to take for granted
Things others worked hard to ensure i received
honestly...just makes me believe
You need a boot up your ass.....

Let's be honest
If I had a choice
Between light or dark
I'd choose the latter.
& walk away from it showing all kinds of snark
People fear the dark
Wish it, Leave it, Shun it away...
I like its mystery, welcome it each day
At one point in my life
im became enshrouded in it
& to tell the truth....since im being honest
If you let me....I'll pull you in it......

Twisted

A small purge from my mind....

If you all don't mind....

Stay on that straight and narrow

Never bending

Never falter

Walking the path onto the cosine of zero

And I must play that part

Because you never know who's watching

And you never wanna seem weak

To those who hold you high

So I sit, grin & bare it all

One single tear I cry

..i wipe that bitch away

for the weaknesses that make me human

like the rest of you

isn't allowed

it is only perfection

or defection in your world

and even if i quit, you'll never let me go

I'll dress as the white knight

when inside nothing more than a black mage

The armor you place on me

Weighs about 100 times my age.

But what am I to do

When I carry the world for you

When I place it all on my shoulders

Because I know not what else to do

People think my life is easy

Im sure you all could be me

& I'd gladly tell you I wouldn't trade my life for another

Cuz I am strong enough to shoulder 

this heavy damn load that tries to make my legs give way

Leave me be & let me enjoy my last minutes

Because my time is ticking....can't you hear it bending

kinda sounds like the sands in an hour glass

...i guess im running out of time

every second of everyday

I can feel the twisting of this soul of mine 

Bent out of place....

....pretty much like my spine

The code

A code of honor
A way of life
A deafening silence
A quiet thunderstorm


I can still remember clearly
Days when I moved in the shadows freely
Senses heightened
I traversed stealthy.

Now I've lost my touch
They'd say I've gotten lazy
.shiiiiiiiiid
I'd prolly have to agree

Times have changed
Rules have evolved
& If you can't adapt
then your name gets called

Where does that leave me?
Standing on the inside
Wondering.....
Do I Continue to live the lazy life?
or grind toward what made me great.. ?

I've become weak,
I've become soft,
I know these things
because I haven't destroyed you all.

But if I do return
To the form I once held
Make zero mistake about it
It will be bloody, bruised & ready to raise hell......