Old Poetry - "Off the brain in da library at 5am" (12/12/07)

Fresh off da brain, through the keyboard...

5AM, 

cant sleep

so watz mo betta than runnin' da streets

seen alot of thingz in dis life of mine

But until u look at life through the eyes of sorrow

u aint doin nuttin but livin a lie

Itz just sumin bout tha word dispair

that'll make it seem that nothin' else could compare

To tha underlyin' fact that ur name is black

Cuz of a misunderstandin'

Now dat shyt is wack.

Theres no tyme to tell da tale

Of how i lost a good friend

Person of good heart, one who's friendship i neva would sell

So....things propelled, feelings accelled 

now im in da library

but itz feelz like hell.

I offer mah apology to you Princess,

Damn, and i didnt even really get to kno u yet

So...i get tha feelin' datz da last i hear from you

I cant blame you

Cuz i kno ur motivez r true

I put mahself in ya positiion

Nd i kinda figured out

Just wat exactly wat chu talkin bout

So once again, sorry

Do wat chu do

It would b nice

if i could just speak 2 u

Anyways, back to da flow

Well....not a flow, just a pattern

Ma patterns of thoughts

Dat splatter into ma brain

a 100 milez an hour

drivin me insane

A mix of emotions

Tellin me wat to do

How to feel

Once again.....dis shyt aint cool

I wish i was one me

not a mind divided

So all ma conversations

could be one-sided

But there in lies tha problem

perhaps its tha division 

that keepz ma brain spinnin'

Dat keepz me livin' nd chillin'

Im a walking paradox

An oxymoron in truth

If anyone out there feels how i feel

please tell me wat to do

Chillin next to lyrical genius Chekka Fred

Just wonderin' why i feel so dead

it seemz wen im happy, all goes right

but when tha corridors of tha mind dissapear into darkness

nd i just dont feel dat spark

dat spark to jumpstart ma day

da darkness spreads nd wat chu have is a heartless

Ma Heart done fell out da Kingdom from which it came

This is no game

This is on everything that must do with my name

See bcuz i am all that i touch

not physically, but spiritually

i make movez, impact livez,

sometimez greatly, most of tha time not by much

Just a crack of a smile on ya darkest day

makez me feel like i just paved da way

all u gotta do is walk it

Brain is gassed out

Mayb ill write another

So glad dis life ends

Nd i can begin another