Old Poetry --- Tears Open Doors (10.19.07)

Tears Open Doors

In a flash back, i track back
to a time when, tha only friends i had 
were tha ghosts raisin' tha hairs on ma back
to a time when, mah only drive to stay alive
was a chance to run around tha track

the chance to be free
for those twenty four seconds
down tha 200 meter dash was all me
there was no spectators, there was no me
there was just space, i was space, space was me
there were no bullies, no jokes, no guns
there was just space to run

Run Away from tha fear
Run Away from ma tears
Run Away from tha spirits
Run Away cuz i didnt wanna hear it

Didnt wanna hear ma brother died
Didnt wanna hear ma mother cry
Didnt wanna hear all ma false pride
that kept me alive, wen all i was doin was livin a lie

And as I ran, The tears ran
Down ma cheeks
Somehow they empowered me, 
Told the coward in me, "MAN UP"

I was not a baby anymore,
it was time for me to step up.
Doors were closin' in ma past, new ones openin up
It was ma decision to give it all up.

Start over, begin anew
It was like runnin a lap
Finish one, got anotha to do
Ma spirit lifted, i felt gifted
to have a second chance
to take a quick glance
and realize, that it wasnt for me.

Tears roll down ma face right now
it 3:18 on ma AM dial.
cuz da past is a powerful thing
Da joy of makin it through makez me wanna sing..
but we gon skip dat part, save it for lata

Tears open doors
Either past or present
The time of day, you must give it
Dont run from ur past
Cuz damn, that thing is fast
take ur mistakes, harness em
smack it on tha ass,

And ride your memories to tha next door
be mindful of whats in store,
utilize your friends, thats wat we're here for
Cuz some of us already kno,
TEARS OPEN DOORS